Posts Tagged 'crazy single girl life'

An Open Letter to the Guy Not Looking for a Relationship

Dear Guy Not Looking for a Relationship,

It seems that, for whatever reason, you and I keep finding one another; it’s happened at least 4 times in the last year. I am beginning to think that I have somehow stumbled on a secret pheromone that only you can smell, or something. Perhaps it’s that I’ve been single for so, so long. Despite what you may think, though, I am not desperate. It’d be nice if it was someone else’s turn to take out the trash every once in awhile, but fortunately I’m in a financial position that I can pay a housecleaner, and she does it once every other week.

Regardless of how you keep landing on my doorstep, I think that you need to know something. Though I’m not desperate, I am also not not looking for a relationship. If that double negative has confused you, allow me to clarify, I’m not the one for you. I don’t want to continuously reside in the somewhere in-between, kinda, sorta, halfway, partly girlfriend space. It’s not particularly fun for me. Which doesn’t mean that I will expect you to make a commitment to me right off the bat, but if you know at the beginning that you’re not down, well then I offer the following suggestions to avoid any awkward situations.   Continue reading ‘An Open Letter to the Guy Not Looking for a Relationship’

CSGL – The Test

So, here’s the thing – it’s come to my attention that I could probably benefit for being a bit more selective about who I go out with.   In fact, I’ve been flat out, point blank told that I’ve been dating morons who are well beneath me.     In an effort to help myself choose more wisely, I’m compiling a list of standards, a list of real or hypothetical situations and characteristics which would eliminate fellas from my dating pool.    Some of this shit may seem pretty obvious, but I’m just trying to be, um, comprehensive.   It’s kind of like a true or false test to determine a dude’s value as a potential date.     There is no curve, and this test is pass-fail.   This is 100% of your grade.   I reserve the right to add more questions as I see fit at any time.

And so, I present, the test!  I will not date you if:

  1. You are so drunk while you are hitting on me that you don’t notice that you’re dribbling or drooling beer down your chin and onto your chest.
  2. You do not have some sort of occupation (doesn’t necessarily have to be a 9-5 type job or even a job – you could be a student, for example).
  3. Your pick up line is “I have a really good job”.
  4. You live with your parents.
  5. You introduce me to a group of your friends as ‘my girlfriend’, but later claim to have nothing but platonic feelings for me.
  6. You ignore me.
  7. You don’t listen to me.
  8. You have a hobby that you insist that I adopt as a condition of our dating.
  9. Your favorite band is Limp Bizkit, Korn, Hoobastank, Creed, Coldplay, or Linkin Park.
  10. You work in law enforcement.
  11. You try to sleep with my friends behind my back.
  12. You’re mean to my cat.
  13. You’re married.
  14. You already have a girlfriend.
  15. You already have a boyfriend.
  16. You are in the middle of a divorce.
  17. You get arrested on our first date.
  18. You have no idea who Lloyd Dobbler is.
  19. You think making fun of me is a form of flirting.
  20. You are constantly giving me mixed signals.
  21. You haven’t read at least two books in the last six months.
  22. You have an issue of Maxim in your bathroom.
  23. You voted for George W. Bush.
  24. You try to get me to make-out with a girl so you can watch.
  25. You ask me if I have a Brazilian.
  26. You have a child out in the world that you’re not helping to raise.
  27. You don’t want to wear a condom.
  28. You come on to me so hard that I feel a little frightened.
  29. You knowingly try to hit on me the same week that I got dumped by some other dude.
  30. You don’t want to see my favorite movie at least once, even though you think it will probably be totally lame.
  31. You don’t like “kids’ movies”.
  32. You say my friend is ‘weird’.
  33. You say my friend is ‘gross’.
  34. You ask for a foot massage on our second date.
  35. You hate or fear children.
  36. You say something to me that is so absurd and ridiculous that I feel obligated to start a tumblr based on it.
  37. You refuse to meet me halfway.
  38. You act like you might be into men, but refuse to admit it.
  39. You scare me.
  40. You scare my friends.
  41. You want to put me up on a pedestal or treat me as a trophy.
  42. You are not supportive of my goals.
  43. You insist that I get into a serious, monogamous relationship with you immediately after I meet you without giving me a chance to get to know you first.
  44. You so much as mention that you might want me to change a single molecule of my body in any way.
  45. You try to move in with me without being asked.
  46. You use my toothbrush.
  47. You leave the bathroom door open while you’re using it.
  48. You over share about how you’re carrying baggage from your ex from ten years ago the first time we have a conversation.
  49. You give unsolicited advice and then get angry when I tell you that I have the situation under control and don’t need your advice.
  50. You offer me your phone number, and then get upset with me for calling you.
  51. You say “you’re not how I expected you to be from reading your blog”….. Seriously, get the fuck out!

EXTRA CREDIT:  You could get an immediate pass if one of my close girl friends gives you the thumbs up.    Let’s face it, their bullshit-detecters are much better than mine.

CSGL – I Can’t Be Gay For You

Buckle up, kiddos, ’cause this is going to be a whopper of a post.

So, I’m not regularly dating.  I am, however, irregularly dating.

I mean, I still have a profile up on a dating site, but since it’s not really breaking my heart to be single, I’m not fully invested in the whole process, am sort of half  doing it to be doing something, and it’s not going so well.  More than anything there have just been a lot of awkward exchanges, and some red flags a’waving.   But I digress . . .

I’ve met a couple of people here and there that I’ve been hanging out with.   It’s all very much just about as serious as Sponge Bob, at this point.   Yep, “still” (grr) single.  Still crazy.

So, last night I was hanging out with a guy friend, and the topic of threesomes came up.  I said that I wasn’t interested in having a threesome with a guy and another girl.  This lead him to say that he didn’t think that he and I could ever be compatible, because I’m too closed minded, since I wouldn’t consider a threesome.   I’m not closed minded.  I’m straight.

(It should be noted that I had not been considering having sex with him, so this is kind of a moot point.)

It reminded me of an exchange I had with another fella some time back.  I was trying to encourage him to stop with the endless flirting, and, you know, actually take me Out, instead of just talking about it.   Well, he had suddenly changed his tune, and let me know that now he had decided to only take out “ladies who like other ladies.”

What exactly am I supposed to do with this?   I guess whatever floats your boat, but what about actually floats my boat?  I also just don’t understand why this would be such a shock to anyone.   I mean, why would anyone assume that I would be into women when I’m so obviously into men, and haven’t shown any signs of being into women.   I guess it’s wrong to assume anything about anyone’s preference, but it’s equally wrong to assume that I can just turn gay all of a sudden.

It’s a huge double standard.  These same guys, they would never dream of having a threesome with me and another guy.   It would never even occur to them, and there’s not a lot of precedent for it in media, either.  While there are so many examples in pop culture of the portrayal that women’s sexuality is fluid, men’s is in most cases portrayed to be rigid.   For women, there are a gajillion porns, Girls Gone Wild, Katy Perry’s I Kissed a Girl, etc, where at any moment a woman who identifies as being straight could become attracted to other women.  Because it’s not enough that we face pressure to be beautiful, youthful, smart, and malleable in a hundred other ways, now we have to be bisexual, too.   Or at least be willing to have sex with someone we’re not the least bit attracted to in order to be attractive to the ones we are.

Pardon my French, but FUCK THAT SEXIST SHIT!

Message to the dudes of the world . . . .I can’t help it if I’m hetero.   Oh darn!  I actually am attracted to humans that have body shapes and appearances similar to yours.   What a bloody tragedy.   And this idea that I should have sex with someone I didn’t want just to prove something to you or that it means that I am closed, narrow, or small minded is fucking insulting.

I’m straight.  Get used to it.

Just sayin’.

And a side note to any bisexual women and/or women who do want to have threesomes with another woman, go get your get, and I just want to be clear that I got no problem with you.  In other words, I ain’t mad atcha.

CSGL [Crazy Single Girl Life] – The Year 2012

Every year, I get on here and start hyping about how this is the year I’m going to write this blog more.  Every year, I tell myself that it’s not a resolution, because resolutions are basically a setup to fail.  But if it’s not a resolution, and I still fail anyway, what the hell is that?

The last couple of years, I’ve put myself to the task of some really hard work.  I really haven’t felt like I had a lot that I wanted to say publicly.   Also, there was a somewhat threatening comment that someone tried to leave which didn’t make it out of my moderation queue.   Those two things really made me take a step back, and think about what the heck it is I’m doing with this space.  For the most part, this has always been just where I come to spout off about random shit that’s on my mind, be it dating, friends, travel, or baseball.   I tried to be funny, and it felt good to watch the daily page views go up, and to feel like I was writing something that resonated with other folks out there.   I look at it as a good way to work out things that I might want to write more about in the future, or to vent things in a way that makes me laugh at them, because I’m really big on not taking myself too seriously.  But do I really need to be putting myself out there in the world wide web like this?  Am I really just a self-centered wanker?  The answers are yes and yes.

Look, I’ve gotten plenty of ‘hatemail’ and ‘trollers’ on this blog before, but this was different.  This was a person who wanted me to know that they knew who I really was (no pseudonym) and where I could be found.  It was shocking, a little bit.  And I’ve been working on other projects, so it was really easy to just fall back into those other things, and let Just Sayin’ idle.

No resolutions, no promises, I’m just sayin’ that 2012 is the year I get over it.   Let that person be mad.  Let that person hate.  Let that person come find me.   This is pretty much what restraining orders were made for, so I would love it if ne would show nir face.   I doubt ne will, as obviously this person’s whole threat is based on the premise of making sure I know that ne knows who I am, while not letting me know who ne is.

Anyway, so I’m back, and I’m more badass then ever.   And yes, I am single.  Roar, or something.

I’ve got a lot of exciting things planned for this year, which I am going to share with all you strangers out there and the general population, including my ex’s wife and my mother.  (Hi!  I see you there.)

In no particular order, here is a list of things I plan to blog about in 2012:

  • My actual New Year’s Resolution, which is not to blog more
  • Boot camp fitness classes (also not a resolution)
  • Bicycling
  • Planned travel to Costa Rica and hopefully back to Kauai again
  • Elections!  (oh fun, more arguing)
  • Dating!  (oh fun, more arguing)
  • Feminism! (oh fun, more arguing)
  • San Francisco Giants back in the playoffs!  (Hello, Mr. Posey.  We’ve missed you.)
  • Music – shows and albums, oh boy
  • Oakland!
  • And possibly some pictures of my cat being cute.

So sit back, relax, and enjoy while I do my best to hold up my end of the bargain.

And if you have something nasty to say, well, you go right ahead sparky, but if you make it personal, I’m going to ignore the shit out of it from here on out.

Just sayin’!

CSGL – Some Guys Just Can’t Take a Hint

A couple of nights ago, I was out with some friends, and there was this very unusual dude who just couldn’t seem to see that Cookie was not having it.  This is, unfortunately, something I have seen more than a couple times before.  If you, like me, watched hours of Looney Tunes as a kid, you might remember that poor little kitty cat that was always trying to squirm out of the clutches of Pepe le Pew.   That is exactly what she looks like when this happens to her.  And this guy was certainly lePew-ific.  He showed up at the karaoke bar wearing Rambo style face paint and an unfortunate choice of bonnet.

So I wrote a haiku about it:

Creepy beret dude
Undesired Advances
Punch him in the dick

Just sayin’.

CSGL – Aloha

It’s been a well known fact to everyone around me that I’ve needed a vacation.   Case in point, my boss kept saying to me in our weekly one on one meetings, “Peggy, go on vacation.”  The only thing was, being a Crazy Single Girl, I didn’t really have anyone to go on vacation with.  I knew if I was going to take a vacay, I was going to have to go on my own.    The idea of going alone, didn’t really bother me, but I wasn’t sure where I should go.  I wanted to make sure that I would enjoy myself, so I wanted to make sure that there would be plenty of stuff for me to do, but also someplace where I could have some downtime, and that I could stay someplace nice.   Another concern was safety.  I didn’t want to be a worrywart, but I also didn’t want to spend even a single moment of my vacation feeling uncertain about being alone or worrying about getting lost someplace by myself where I might not know how to ask for directions.  So, I was undecided for several weeks about what I should do or where I should go.

Then one Sunday afternoon, I was sitting here on the couch with my cat, flipping channels trying to find something to watch on television, and came across a movie.   A very bad movie.  A very cheesy, bad movie that I’m embarrassed to admit that I watched five minutes of. It was a movie about a single woman who goes on vacation by herself to Hawaii.   And, yes, it was on Lifetime.   And yes, she ends up hooking up with a much younger man, who is, of course, a surf instructor.   (Bloody hell!)

Okay, awful, awful movie.   As bad as that DVD looks.   But it gave me a very good idea.

I started looking into vacation packages to Hawaii, and decided that the island of Kauai would be best for my purposes.  Mama Bear went there a couple of years ago, and told me about a kayaking trip she’d taken, and I’d wanted to try that kayaking.  So I booked my trip for the week of 4th of July.

And the lead up to the trip, and hearing everyone’s ideas and opinions about it, was almost as fun as the trip was.  I heard everything from “you’re going to be surrounded by newlyweds” to “you’re going to hook up with a surf instructor”  (reference Heather Locklear above and you’ll know that the women who said this have been watching too much Lifetime) and finally “Kauai doesn’t really have a hook-up vibe.”   I shrugged at it all, and said “whatever happens, happens; I’m open for anything,” but hooking-up wasn’t really my purpose for going.  I wasn’t going to turn down any surf instructors, and the thought of a vacation fling had crossed my mind, but I had no intention of cruising for them.  I wanted to get the heck out of Oakland, and I wanted to relax.  I wanted to spend some time in the sun, and I wanted to try some things I had never tried before.  More than anything, I was hoping I’d get bored.

Do you have any idea how long it’s been since I was legitimately bored?  Yeah, me neither, because it’s been that long.

So finally, after weeks of anticipation, the day arrived for me to fly away.  I arrived at the airport at the recommended time, about an hour and a half before my flight, only to find that the flight had just been delayed for four hours.   Crap.

I did what any self-respecting, self-sufficient CSG would do.   I found a bar, and I ordered a beer.   Within a few minutes, I realized that the guy next to me at the bar was on my same flight.  And he was alone!  And he was cute!   …..   And he was wearing a wedding ring.  Double crap.

To say that my first day of vacation was anti-climatic would be an understatement.  Originally I was booked to get into Kauai at 7:30.  Plenty of time to pick up my rental car, check into my room, and get the lay of the land.   I boarded my flight four hours late, and a couple of beers later.   I got into Kauai about 11:30, and by the time I got my bag and my rental car, it was well after midnight.  Oh, and my rental car!  I had booked (and prepaid) for a compact car.   I got in so late that all they had left were SUVs, which some people would see as a free upgrade, but I was not impressed.  I barely drive at home, and I do not know how to drive an SUV.  I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous about it.

I finally got to my hotel, and to my room, around 1:00 in the morning local time, so 4:00 a.m. at home.  I immediately made the executive decision that I was going to stay in bed until noon the next day.  The wild roosters had other ideas.

But I was stubborn, and I did not get up until noon, and then I spent the majority of the day by the pool.

In the afternoon, I sauntered over to the poolside bar, and found that it was happy hour, and they were serving $3 Mai Tais.   Lordy.  Now I always say you should never let a Mai Tai make a decision for you, but as long as you let them know who’s in charge, they’re a fine drink, and I mean, I was in Hawaii.  It’s kind of required.   I ordered a late lunch, had my Mai Tai, and I busted out my Kindle to do some reading. (I was reading a book about Nazi Germany – perfect light reading for poolside.)   It wasn’t very long before the first in a series of recurring events on that trip came to pass.

As I was sitting minding my own, a guy came up to the bar, ordered a Mai Tai, and asked me what I was reading.  He was quite a bit older than me, and, how shall I say this….not my type at all, but I told him what I was reading, and we started talking.  He moved to a sit nearer to me, and asked about my tattoos.  He started telling me about himself, he was divorced, and visiting Kauai with his two teenage sons.  He pointed even pointed them out across the pool.  Then things took a turn for the strange.  He proceeded to tell me about how he split his time working in DC, where he was from, and in Scottsdale, and that he had left his wife for a gal he met on eHarmony in Scottsdale.   So, yeah, he was selling himself really well.  Then he began launching into a borage of conservative political ideas, which pretty much killed the conversation.  He wasn’t very charming, and he certainly wasn’t a hot surf instructor.  Damn you, Heather Locklear.

I had no idea that this would be a trend.

That evening, as I was sitting on my balcony, I could hear a bit of music drifting up from the lobby.  I wasn’t really tired, having stayed in bed so late, so I decided to check it out.  I found my way to the lobby bar, where there was a guy playing guitar and singing, and sat down at the bar in front of the tele, hoping to catch some highlights from the ball game.  That was the night that I made friends with the bartender, E, which was probably the smartest thing I could have done.   Not too long after I had ordered a beer, a fella walked up to the bar, and sat next to me.

And here we go again.

I have to say, the second guy was not nearly as creepy.  He was actually kind of sweet, and wasn’t really hitting on me too hard. He was also divorced and there with his kids and extended family.  We talked a bit about activities, and he told me about a great cruise he’d done with his family, and told me about how he had booked it with the hotel’s concierge.   All the while, my buddy E was laughing at me.   It wouldn’t be the last time he was getting a laugh out of my time at the bar.

The next day, I got myself a nice breakfast, I spent a little time by the pool, I visited the concierge to book myself some fun, and it being the 4th of July, I went out to find some fireworks.  I went to the one official fireworks display on the island, Concert in the Sky.  It’s a typical kind of fair, with food and bands.   The bands were a trip, since they kept going back and forth between songs that sounded like traditional Hawaiian music and disco.  And they did it effortlessly.   As I was sitting there, I posted to Facebook “Sitting in a damp field listening to Hawaiian music and waiting for fireworks. Yay, America! No ka oi!”

And once the sun went down, explosions!

The next morning, I had to get up pretty early for my kayaking trip.  It was the only thing I felt was absolutely required on my trip, and the only excursion I had booked before I left.  The trip included a kayak up the Wailua River, and then a hike to Secret Falls.  I had never been kayaking before, and I was looking forward to it, but I was also a bit nervous, because the kayaks are built for two people, and I was by myself, of course.  Luckily, when I arrived, there was a family on the same tour, and they were willing to loan me their teenager to help me row my canoe.

They were really nice, and their kids were cool; they sort of adopted me for the day, and it turned out that they were also from the Bay Area.   I liked the kayaking, but I definitely enjoyed the hike even more.   It was pretty muddy on the trail, and I slipped quite a bit, but it was still a lot of fun.  I’d never been to the bottom of a waterfall before, let alone swam under one.

Definitely what made the trip was our tour guide, Jesse, who was a real character, with a lot of stories.  He, according to him, had done a hundred and one amazing and unbelievable adventures.  Unbelievable being the key word.   But he was a good storyteller.

But definitely the best part of it all was that there was a rope swing along the trail over the river.   That was another thing that I had never done, and I never thought I would do.   It was an amazing feeling to go flying on the end of a rope, but the most amazing part was letting go.    (There’s probably something to that, but that’s an entirely different post.)

The kayak ride back was not easy, and I was really tired, but I had also booked myself to go to a luau that evening.   Now, overall, the concierge hooked me up, however, the luau she helped me booked was not in any way a traditional luau.  They said that it was a Cirque du Soleil style.   Once again, I was a little bit nervous, being alone, of who I was going to be sat with at the luau.  I thought for sure that I was going to end up sitting a whole table full of newlyweds, but I was really excited because I got my first fresh flower lei of my life.

They also had a little craft section, and I bought the necklace you can see in the picture.  (I don’t wear a lot of jewelry, but I love this necklace.)   I was sat a table with an entire extended family, the grandmother, her kids, their spouses, and their children.  They were really nice, and I had a very nice chat with the Grandmother who was sitting next to me.  The only thing about them was that they weren’t at all impressed with the food.  I, on the other hand, had multiple servings.  So much good food.  Kalua pork, lomi lomi salmon, ono, purple sweet potato, mac salad, coconut curry vegetables, and of course poi.   It was so good.  Also, a couple more Mai Tais.

After dinner, there was quite the show.  Dancing girls, dancing boys, fire dancers, the works.   But kind of over the top, if I’m being honest.

And after the show, I got to take some more up close pictures of the performers.

You’d probably think after all that that I would be dead tired, and want to go straight to bed.   And you’d be wrong, because I was on my twelfth wind.   So when I got back to the hotel, I dropped in on E.  Since I was still wearing the lei, there were many jokes about it.  Of course, within fifteen minutes, a fella sat down at the bar next to me.  E was cracking up.   The difference was, this guy was not divorced.  His third wife was upstairs in their room.  Apparently they weren’t having as good of a time on their vacation as I was, and they’re relationship was falling apart.  So, it was a mix of him hitting on me, and bitching about being married.   And then he started giving me a hard time about wearing makeup.  My favorite was when I said something about my big floppy hat keeping me from getting sunburnt, and he snidely remarked, “how can you get any sun underneath all that hair?”  Charm personified?  No.  Piece of fucking work?  Hella.

Damn you, Heather Locklear!

The next day, I didn’t have any excursions planned, but I hadn’t seen much of the island, so I decided I would go for a drive.   It’s not a big island, so it’s really not a long drive, but there are lots of great spots to stop and take some amazing pictures.

It really is one of the most amazing and beautiful places.   It’s breathtaking, and these pictures, they don’t even do it justice.

I got back to the hotel, and had dinner at the bar.  It was going to be the last night that E would be working during my stay.  It was also, thankfully, the last night that I got hit on by an older divorced guy.   Now, mind you he, he wasn’t as over the top as the last guy, but true to form, it was an experience.   I have never in my life actually been patted on the ass by a stranger….until that night.    Had it happened under different circumstances, I might have punched him in the eye, and knocked him on his ass.   I don’t know why, but in that moment, I just thought it was hilarious.   Maybe it was because I was on vacation, and I figured it would be fun to tell the tale when I got home of the fifty-something year-old tire salesman (I can’t make this shit up) who patted me on the tookus, and who couldn’t remember my name for longer than five minutes in a row.

But I had to go to bed early, because the next day was the biggest day of them all, and also the earliest wake up call.  Normally I would say that you should never, ever get up before six when you’re on vacation.  But this was worth it.  The final thing that the concierge helped me book for my second to last day in Kauai was a catamaran cruise of the Na Pali Coast.   This is the cliff coast of the island that you cannot reach by roads.   You can only see it one of two ways, by sea or by air.

But did I mention that it was really early?

But I made it in time, and got on the boat, and we were under way.

The water was gorgeous, the views were gorgeous, the guys on the crew were…trying to be funny.  They were kind of funny.   Kind of.

And soon enough, we came across a couple sea turtles, who were way faster than my camera, and also, dolphins.

Part way up the coast, they dropped anchor, and we got to go snorkeling.  This was another thing that I had never done.   I didn’t have one of those underwater cameras, because I wanted to experience it more than take pictures of it.  Plus, I wasn’t sure that those things would take a very good picture, and didn’t want to waste my money.   It turns, out though, that I’m not very good at snorkeling.  My nose kept running in the mask, and sunblock got in my eyes.   So I kept coming up out of the water and rubbing my eyes and nose.   They had a crew member on a surfboard in the water to keep an eye on us, and he noticed that the mask was bothering me, so he started chatting with me, and invited me up on the surfboard to see some more dolphins that were swimming by.   Also, he taught me how to tandem paddle on the board.   Take that, Heather Locklear!

If you don’t know, and I didn’t before, tandem paddling involves the person on the back of the board, in my case the helpful crew member, has their face all up in your backside.  Of course he really wasn’t hitting on me, but so what?   At least he wasn’t 50, and, you know, weird.

After paddling and snorkeling, it was time for us to continue our cruise along the cliffs.  The cliffs are stunning.

It takes a lot of work to stay that pale in Hawaii, you know?

For my last day, I decided that I just wanted to take my time packing and checking out.  Ultimately, I ended up lounging by the pool, again, because relaxing and feeling the sun on my shoulders is definitely not something I get much of here in the foggy bay area.   I sat down with a notebook, and made notes about all my adventures, and even did a little work on a story I’ve been writing.  Finally, in the evening, I had to make my way to the airport.  I had a quick flight to Honolulu, and then the redeye back to San Francisco.

But my vacation did end on a very high note, as I made a new friend on the flight over to Honolulu, and friends who live on tropical islands are good friends to have.  I’m sure Heather Locklear would agree.

It was probably one of the best vacations I’ve ever had, and I’m really excited about the idea of taking more solo vacations.  I met a lot of really cool people, even if I also met some cheesy divorcees.  I don’t think I would have met quite as many people if I had been there with a friend, since I would have talked with them more than anyone, and not been as open to striking up conversations with as many people.  My favorite part was just how many things I got to do that I had never tried before.

I was really surprised when I got home, and so many people said to me that they were proud of me and that they thought I was brave for going by myself.  I hadn’t really put that much thought into it.  I just knew that I wanted to go, and I wasn’t going to let the fact that no one could go with me stop me.   Besides, going alone meant that I got to do whatever I wanted to do, and nothing I didn’t want to.

Mostly I came home feeling like there’s nothing in this world that I can’t do, if it’s what I really want.

And also feeling pretty damn good about how I look in a bikini for the first time in my whole damn life.

Just sayin’

CSGL – Holding Out

So, I know it’s been awhile.   Just to quickly summarize, still in the bay area, still working, still 30-ish, still have the coolest cat in the world, still a Giants fan.   And yes, still single.   If your counting, it’s been three years.

The other day, someone actually asked me why I was single.   Now, there’s a plenitude of reasons why I’m single, but mostly it’s just timing.  I haven’t been in the right place at the right time with the right guy.   So here I am.   Friday night, on my couch, with my cat, just got done watching the ball game, and no intention of being elsewhere or doing otherwise.   Anyway, back to the question.  Why am I single?     Because I’m holding out for Awesome.   That’s what I said.   And you know what?  It’s true!

So this is what holding out for Awesome looks like.    And in about 15 minutes, it’s also going to look like me taking a bubble bath.   Of course, Awesome isn’t going to find me in the bathroom.  (That would be really fucking weird.)  So, I’ve got to go out sometimes.  I’ve got to put myself out there.

So, I gave a guy my number.   I don’t know if he’s Awesome or Not Awesome.   If he doesn’t call me, he’s definitely Not Awesome.   And I bought two tickets to the Giants’ game on the 11th, and I’m going to see if I can find a date.

And if that doesn’t work, well at least I’ll still get to be at a ballgame.   Hopefully watching the Giants cream the Dodgers.  Unlike tonight.   No throwing balls away or kicking them when you should be picking them up and throwing them to first.

But did you see that rocket the kid launched into center field tonight?  That was a thing of beauty.  Gotta love a rookie.   Brandon Belt might be my new hero.

Just sayin’.


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