Yeah, so remember what I was saying about leaving that door open. About how you leave yourself open to the experiences of life, sometimes you get the good. Sometimes you get the not so good. And sometimes you get the just plain strange.
My weekend started out pretty good and normal. Kayphore and I went out to see some bands and karaoke. By the way, best karaoke performances of my life, and you missed them. Anyway, it was all good. And then . . .
Kayphore and I were kidnapped and held hostage by a Rockstar. On accident.
At least, I hope it was an accident. He’s a nice enough guy, and I don’t know that he would be trying to make me panic with a desire to fling myself down on the floor, kicking and flailing my arms while sobbing. “I . . . want . . . to . . . go . . . home!”
It was certainly the most interestingly random thing that’s happened to me in a long time. And I can’t say that it was awful, but it was definitely not how I planned to spend that evening. Any evening, really.
We finally made it out of there Saturday morning.
And that was just the start of my weekend.
It’s part of the process, really. I opened myself to a lot of new experiences in the last year, and I call it my Crazy Single Girl Life. It’s what you have to do, right? You have to invite the good in. Unfortunately, with the good, sometimes a bit of unpleasant dust blows in with it.
Part of the growing I need to do is to learn to better trust my instincts. For the last few months, my gut has been telling me that something was wrong. I tried to change some of my behavior, and distance myself in certain situations, to shield myself from some behavior that was making me uncomfortable. I tried to remain optimistic, and tell myself that these were things that would just blow over with patience. However, there comes a point where you realize that the best answer is just to stop and say, “NO. No more. I’m done.”
I have quit the band and the soccer team.
It wasn’t all bad, and I have made some wonderful friends. I know that we will see each other, and continue to be a part of each others lives.
But not everyone I meet is deserving of my friendship or my respect.
And at the same time, just because you shouldn’t be friends with someone, that doesn’t mean that you have to be enemies. It just means that you move on.
I realized the other day that I’m very likely to utter the phrase “You’re my hero,” but that it is almost always directed at a woman. I was thinking about that, and I think I figured out why that is. It all goes back to this quote:
Remember, Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, except backwards and in high heels.
My sisters, my mother, my grandmothers, my aunts, my friends. All a bunch of women who’ve done a series of ordinary, unexceptional things . . . aside from the fact that they did the things that someone thought they couldn’t, shouldn’t, or wouldn’t do.
They served their country.
They wore pants (or trousers if you’re in England).
They bought houses.
They got doctorate degrees.
They raised children on their own.
They majored in computer science in college.
They played in rock bands.
They owned businesses.
They played sports.
They got tattoos.
They climbed rocks.
They spoke their mind.
They changed their own flat tires.
They stood up for what they believed in.
They built websites.
They built sets.
And they did thousands of other small things that said to the world, “I will be who I am. I will do what I see fit to do. I will take care of myself. And you . . . you will not ever constrict me to some narrow idea of who and what I should be based solely on the fact that I happen to be a woman!”
And mostly, they did it without thinking that anyone would ever notice, let alone feel the need to point it out to the rest of the world.
So I like to tell them about it.
And if you’re a guy, and it makes you jealous to hear me say it to another woman, but not to you . . . well, I have two things to say about that . . .
#1 – Insecure much?
#2 – Suck it up!
PLW’s Star Wars Day Radio Pandora Station!
Yes, it is the worst pun ever. What of it?