In Case You Were Wondering, Facebook…

Yes!  This is totally misogynist!!

“Because, OMG, skinny bitches are gross!  Who would want to fuck that?  Amirite?”

People’s bodies come in all shapes and sizes.   You don’t have to be attracted to them all, but you sure as shit don’t need to do line-ups of one type against another and then post (or repost) some body policing shame-a-thon up on a social network in order to get high fives and ‘likes’.

And if you thought this was somehow empowering, think again.   Our body shape and size is largely determined by genetics, so how is this compare and contrast line-up supposed to make anyone feel better, when all it’s really doing is saying, “If you look more like the women on the top, well then it sucks to be you, because you’re scary!”  And the overwhelming majority of us look nothing like either of those two sets of women. “Real women have curves.” No, actually, not all women do, and it doesn’t make them any less fucking real if they don’t.

Also, and why isn’t this the most obvious fucking thing ever, but all the photos featured in the bottom row are obviously from fashion shoots, while the ones on the top are candid shots of celebrities who happened to be at the beach?   No one looks in real life like they do at a photo shoot!  Even before Photoshop, they would still pose them, and stitch them into swimsuits that would be most flattering, do tall their hair and makeup, so comparing a model shot of Elizabeth Taylor to a shot of Keira Knightly just hanging out at the beach is fucking ridiculous.

If you want to encourage acceptance of women’s bodies, you should find an image that is a positive portrayal of multiple shapes, colors, sizes, without imposing a hierarchy.   Something like, I dunno, This…

Source: naturalmodelsla
Source: naturalmodelsla Borrowed from - http://healthyisclassy.tumblr.com/ Click to visit!

Also, Keira Knightly’s abs are fucking ridiculously jacked.  Holy six pack!  God damn, girl, you buff!

Just sayin’.

CSGL – I Can’t Be Gay For You

Buckle up, kiddos, ’cause this is going to be a whopper of a post.

So, I’m not regularly dating.  I am, however, irregularly dating.

I mean, I still have a profile up on a dating site, but since it’s not really breaking my heart to be single, I’m not fully invested in the whole process, am sort of half  doing it to be doing something, and it’s not going so well.  More than anything there have just been a lot of awkward exchanges, and some red flags a’waving.   But I digress . . .

I’ve met a couple of people here and there that I’ve been hanging out with.   It’s all very much just about as serious as Sponge Bob, at this point.   Yep, “still” (grr) single.  Still crazy.

So, last night I was hanging out with a guy friend, and the topic of threesomes came up.  I said that I wasn’t interested in having a threesome with a guy and another girl.  This lead him to say that he didn’t think that he and I could ever be compatible, because I’m too closed minded, since I wouldn’t consider a threesome.   I’m not closed minded.  I’m straight.

(It should be noted that I had not been considering having sex with him, so this is kind of a moot point.)

It reminded me of an exchange I had with another fella some time back.  I was trying to encourage him to stop with the endless flirting, and, you know, actually take me Out, instead of just talking about it.   Well, he had suddenly changed his tune, and let me know that now he had decided to only take out “ladies who like other ladies.”

What exactly am I supposed to do with this?   I guess whatever floats your boat, but what about actually floats my boat?  I also just don’t understand why this would be such a shock to anyone.   I mean, why would anyone assume that I would be into women when I’m so obviously into men, and haven’t shown any signs of being into women.   I guess it’s wrong to assume anything about anyone’s preference, but it’s equally wrong to assume that I can just turn gay all of a sudden.

It’s a huge double standard.  These same guys, they would never dream of having a threesome with me and another guy.   It would never even occur to them, and there’s not a lot of precedent for it in media, either.  While there are so many examples in pop culture of the portrayal that women’s sexuality is fluid, men’s is in most cases portrayed to be rigid.   For women, there are a gajillion porns, Girls Gone Wild, Katy Perry’s I Kissed a Girl, etc, where at any moment a woman who identifies as being straight could become attracted to other women.  Because it’s not enough that we face pressure to be beautiful, youthful, smart, and malleable in a hundred other ways, now we have to be bisexual, too.   Or at least be willing to have sex with someone we’re not the least bit attracted to in order to be attractive to the ones we are.

Pardon my French, but FUCK THAT SEXIST SHIT!

Message to the dudes of the world . . . .I can’t help it if I’m hetero.   Oh darn!  I actually am attracted to humans that have body shapes and appearances similar to yours.   What a bloody tragedy.   And this idea that I should have sex with someone I didn’t want just to prove something to you or that it means that I am closed, narrow, or small minded is fucking insulting.

I’m straight.  Get used to it.

Just sayin’.

And a side note to any bisexual women and/or women who do want to have threesomes with another woman, go get your get, and I just want to be clear that I got no problem with you.  In other words, I ain’t mad atcha.

CSGL [Crazy Single Girl Life] – The Year 2012

Every year, I get on here and start hyping about how this is the year I’m going to write this blog more.  Every year, I tell myself that it’s not a resolution, because resolutions are basically a setup to fail.  But if it’s not a resolution, and I still fail anyway, what the hell is that?

The last couple of years, I’ve put myself to the task of some really hard work.  I really haven’t felt like I had a lot that I wanted to say publicly.   Also, there was a somewhat threatening comment that someone tried to leave which didn’t make it out of my moderation queue.   Those two things really made me take a step back, and think about what the heck it is I’m doing with this space.  For the most part, this has always been just where I come to spout off about random shit that’s on my mind, be it dating, friends, travel, or baseball.   I tried to be funny, and it felt good to watch the daily page views go up, and to feel like I was writing something that resonated with other folks out there.   I look at it as a good way to work out things that I might want to write more about in the future, or to vent things in a way that makes me laugh at them, because I’m really big on not taking myself too seriously.  But do I really need to be putting myself out there in the world wide web like this?  Am I really just a self-centered wanker?  The answers are yes and yes.

Look, I’ve gotten plenty of ‘hatemail’ and ‘trollers’ on this blog before, but this was different.  This was a person who wanted me to know that they knew who I really was (no pseudonym) and where I could be found.  It was shocking, a little bit.  And I’ve been working on other projects, so it was really easy to just fall back into those other things, and let Just Sayin’ idle.

No resolutions, no promises, I’m just sayin’ that 2012 is the year I get over it.   Let that person be mad.  Let that person hate.  Let that person come find me.   This is pretty much what restraining orders were made for, so I would love it if ne would show nir face.   I doubt ne will, as obviously this person’s whole threat is based on the premise of making sure I know that ne knows who I am, while not letting me know who ne is.

Anyway, so I’m back, and I’m more badass then ever.   And yes, I am single.  Roar, or something.

I’ve got a lot of exciting things planned for this year, which I am going to share with all you strangers out there and the general population, including my ex’s wife and my mother.  (Hi!  I see you there.)

In no particular order, here is a list of things I plan to blog about in 2012:

  • My actual New Year’s Resolution, which is not to blog more
  • Boot camp fitness classes (also not a resolution)
  • Bicycling
  • Planned travel to Costa Rica and hopefully back to Kauai again
  • Elections!  (oh fun, more arguing)
  • Dating!  (oh fun, more arguing)
  • Feminism! (oh fun, more arguing)
  • San Francisco Giants back in the playoffs!  (Hello, Mr. Posey.  We’ve missed you.)
  • Music – shows and albums, oh boy
  • Oakland!
  • And possibly some pictures of my cat being cute.

So sit back, relax, and enjoy while I do my best to hold up my end of the bargain.

And if you have something nasty to say, well, you go right ahead sparky, but if you make it personal, I’m going to ignore the shit out of it from here on out.

Just sayin’!